Trading Paint

• Veteran race car driver Sam Munroe and his son, a fellow driver from a small town overcome family and professional conflicts, balancing competition, ego, resentment and a racing nemesis to come out stronger on the other side.

and much, much more!

[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to the Gran Touring Motor Sports Podcast Break Fix, where we’re always fixing the break into something motor sports.

Dirt track racing is a discipline of motorsport held on clay or dirt surfaced oval. Race tracks often used for thoroughbred horse racing. Dirt track racing started in the United States before a World War I and became widespread during the 1920s and thirties using both automobiles and motorcycles. Two different types of race cars dominate the dirt track scene, open wheel racers in the northeast and the west, and stock cars in the Midwest and the south.

In tonight’s episode of Break Fix, we are rejoined by Steve and Izzy from everything I learned from movies to discuss. Hollywood’s attempt to tip their hat and pay homage to the dirt track world. When we review the 2019 film Trading Paint starring John Travolta and Shania, it’s Wayne. Veteran race car driver, Sam Monroe and his son, a fellow driver from a small [00:01:00] town overcome family and professional conflicts, balancing competition, ego resentment, and erasing nemesis to come out stronger on the other side.

This is Trading Paint. God, I wanna watch that movie, right? , where was that? So we’ll be following your guys format. I’m sure you guys have the play by play of every scene in the movie. So , honestly, I was surprised when I was then. I was like, this is about as much notes as I take for like a 25 minute episode of Captain Power and the Soldiers of the Future.

Like it’s about the same plot, just, oh my God. Stretched out. . We’ll, we’ll get into it, but. Pacing. They needed a Pace car. , . I thought Tom Cruise was in Days of Thunder. Was this not Days of Thunder? Did I watch the wrong movie? No, this wasn’t even Talladega Nights, dude. This was horrendous. Wait, we’re talking about Broken Arrow, right?

I thought this was hard. Target. . Darn. [00:02:00] Oh my God, guys, let’s talk about hard target. Can we talk about hard target? That’s the one with, uh, v, right? With the, with the, with the guy who, who used to be a great soldier until he took an arrow to the knee. Why did they call him Chance? Because my mama

act like I haven’t seen that movie too many times. The most dangerous game. Wayne The Mummy. Okay, anyway, the Mummy team up to be bad guys. All right. Anyway, back to a less good movie, . This was the worst movie in the days of Thunder franchise I’ve ever seen. All right, well that about wraps it up everybody.

Thanks for coming. They were not all jacked up on Mountain Dew. Okay, so you got a car. That don’t impress me much.

Copy. Copyright laws. Copyright laws . It was under 15. We’re good before we get started because I wish I had done [00:03:00] this before. Mountain man Dan talked me into watching this movie with him. What are we drinking tonight? Because this is gonna be a ride . Well, on our end, uh, we have from you went to brewing here in Salt Lake City.

Ellipses, which is a barrel-aged oatmeal stout. I think it was one 11%. Oh, this one was, uh, I think 11.5. Nice. ? No. 11.9. 11.9. That’s right. . And uh, my top. Woo. Our tops. Nice. How about you guys? I mean, in keeping with tradition of our paddock, I’m drinking the finest Jaegermeister by Jagermeister . Yeah, he is getting their quote.

He’s the meister of Yager recycled municipal water. Ooh, ooh. Wait, when you say he recycled, uh, . That water was dinosaur once . Oh, okay. I’m drinking. It’s called, it’s the finest drink. I have to work tomorrow. Does that come in a bottle or on tap? . It comes in a bullet shot right into your mouth. So is that Diet Mountain Dew or [00:04:00] what?

Oh, that’s an Icelandic one that’s uh, colored with the neon plugged in or whatever. Oh yeah, yeah. Ice Mountain Dew in Iceland is weird cuz you can’t have unreal products in your beverages. They banned artificial flavors, colors, and preservatives. So they have to try and match that color they use. It’s not plankton.

It’s a seaweed. Yeah, it’s like that neo fluorescent seaweed or whatever . And so like the bottles of Mountain Dew like glow in the dark, it’s and they’re like opaque like you can’t see through ’em. Yeah. And they’re not caffeinated. That’s perfect. The seaweed’s like the new hot thing now. It’s like the super food.

Did it replace kale? Yeah. I will say though, the Icelandic Pepsi only had six ingredients. I don’t know what they were cause they were in Icelandic, but that was the best Pepsi I’ve ever had in my life. It was better than Mexican Coke. I believe one of ’em translates to yellow number five. All of these things are way more interesting than what we’re about to talk about

That’s exactly what I was going to say. Oh, Steve. Izzy, how did you talk us into [00:05:00] this movie, ? First off, we didn’t know this movie exist until you brought it up on your hundredth. You put this on us. Thank you. Know that pain and that hurt. Don’t you put that evil on me. Ricky Bobby 2019 Movie Trading Paint.

It’s on Netflix. I mean, you guys definitely wanna watch it. It’s only 84 minutes with credits or something. Like it was, it was like a special episode of something. It was pretty sweet. But it’s from Director Carn Cater caterer. Who’s he? Steve. Oh, I’m glad you asked. Did a bunch of shorts. The last four, uh, like Levi’s?

Yeah. Up and away, which I’m guessing is the sequel to up this and then coming soon, a true desert Rose. Sounds like Hallmark channel shit, right? ? Is that like Seal’s biography? What is that? It’s a, it’s a, a sting. It’s a desert. Rose

All right. We’re not gonna quit our singing jobs. [00:06:00] No, not at all. What are you talking about? He’s a goddamn songbird, but, but they, let’s not offend up as a movie. Cuz up and away is not the sequel . No. No, not at all. Not at all. But guys, okay. The writers of this movie though, , one of them, Craig r Welch, this is the only thing he’s done, so I’m guessing it’s mostly him, but the other writer is Gary Garran.

Babe. Does that name sound familiar? Who’s he? Steve? Well, he’s written three things. Mm-hmm. number. Pumpkin head. Oh, like the greatest What movie ever made? 1988 Pumpkin Head. All right. Have you guys ever seen Pumpkin Head? No. Lance Hendrickson, some dummies killed his boy and he calls upon the spirit of vengeance and a pumpkin patch with the help of an old witch and hijinks and Sue watch it.

Oh, good. It’s a real, if he like monster movies, it’s legitimately really good. Classic. It’s directed by Stan Winston. Who’s he? Steve. Oh, he’s the guy that did like all the Terminators and the aliens, like all the practical effects and stuff for that. And he Des Legend? Yeah, he designed the, uh, the Xenomorph.

Yeah. But it was written by, uh, Gary Guran. I [00:07:00] guess the only other two This. And 1996 is Van Perella. Oh my God. . Oh yeah. So, alright. So a 10, a three, and then a negative two . That’s called Range Van Perella. Did that Star Elvira no. Or no? A Disney thing? No. Oh, okay. No stripper was uh, Pamela Anderson there? Yeah.

Right. Or no, that was a comic or something. I don’t know. I haven’t seen va perella. I’m sure it’s great. I googled va perella. It looks like strip Pella, but with vampires. . Yeah. Even better. Hold on. How do you spell it? . Vampire. L l a. . Okay. So Vampire. It’s v a. No, . We are stalling. We really don’t wanna review this, do we?

Yeah. Guys. Starring in this movie. We of course have the other half of face off. John Travolta as Sam Monroe. Yeah. Not just Sam Monroe. Sam The Man Monroe. Oh yes, sorry. Sam the Man [00:08:00] Monroe. Oh my God. Mm-hmm. . We also have, I don’t know, multi Grammy award-winning artist, Shania Twain as Becca. We don’t learn that until about three quarters of the way through the movie.

I, I don’t think I had her name the whole time. I just had, I don’t know, Shania. They said it once. Girlfriend on the dock. . Yeah. So Lynch, Shania Twain walks into this movie and Mutt Lang must be pissed. . , by the way. Shania, you live rent free in my head. 24 hours a day, seven days a week. , who’s bed Have your boots been under for some reason has been stuck in my head since 2001.

Who bad? Have your boots been under?

Uh, but you also got Toby Sebastian as Cam. I don’t know the Sun. Monroe. But Steve, what did we decide Cam was short for?

Cam Cam. Yeah, cam, cam Cam Manifold, . His, [00:09:00] his name was Cam Monroe. We originally were like, oh yeah, it must be short for Camaro or something, cause you know, car guys or whatever. I’m like, no, no. It’s gotta be stupider than that. This movie. It’s like, cam, that’s a thing right? I thought it was Cato. . What they were trying to do was keep with Shania’s reputation of her Hallmark films and they couldn’t come out and say, cam the Shaft, Monroe.

I think we have another couple big hitters. We have Kevin Dunn as Stumpy out of nowhere. I was like, what is going on? ? Hey, you’ve seen Kevin Dunn and stuff? There’s the one that got me is the next one I think you’re about to say. Yeah. The, the other Vega brother Michael Madson as uh Yes. Yes. Bob Linsky.

What was his, Bob the, the machine or some shit, something like that. The antagonist. It was Bob Leadfoot. Linsky. Leadfoot, that’s right. Uh, not Bob VAs from VAs Refrige.

Was Phyllis in here? Did [00:10:00] anybody spotter, hi. Bob Bans from Vans from Refrigeration, but we also had an uncredited star in the film, which we’re gonna talk about more in a little bit. Did you guys pick up on Barry Corbin? No. Who’s he? Steve . His name’s Eric for it. . Who’s he? Eric. So Barry Corbin plays Sheriff Buck Taylor.

He’s been in like a million films over the years and what what’s sad is he was uncredited in the film and he had a great scene. That’s the radio talk show scene that we’ll talk about in a little bit between him and Travolta. Okay. I was wondering if that was like, I don’t know, like somebody, I was supposed to know who it is, like a stock car driver from the fifties or something like, oh yeah, everybody knows that, knows dirt racing, knows this guy.

You would know him most recently from Netflix’s the ranch with Ashton Kutcher as he is the veterinarian cowboy. Which is a terrible show. You mentioned the sheriff and now his role isn’t credited. Do you have to ask yourself, was that by choice ? You know, I don’t think I would wanna be associated with this film [00:11:00] either if they asked me to cameo in it at 85 years old or however old he is.

Yeah, I, I’m good. I’m good. You can keep your credits , no appearance fee. Well, you all didn’t mention, there’s another person in this that I caught on. She’s one of the sand snakes from Game of Thrones. Don’t know her real name, but she played tines sand in the Game of Thrones. She was Cindy the girlfriend?

Rella Loren Fellows. Oh, alright. Oh, is that who that was? Yep. Yep. The one who, uh, will get to it, but at the end of the film probably does the most dangerous stunt in the film. Yes. . , come on. That’s like a Saturday afternoon on TikTok. Yeah. But they also eat Tide pods on TikTok, so, yeah. I, I, I just had a thought, I, I’m sure citing on Travolta for this.

I was like, all right, we can pay you a million dollars or like 30% of the gross, and I’m sure Travolta’s like, what? Yeah. Let’s go to 30%. Any guesses what the worldwide gross of this movie was? $5. I’ve been thinking that the whole time. Please. $1 off. [00:12:00] 800. 800? No. 677,000. $6,898 . Whoa. . I was all by order.

Magnitude or two . 30 of seven grand outta curiosity. Uh, it was it like two grand, 2100, something like that. . Something like that. Yeah. He probably got that. I was like, shit, I don’t remember making this movie. . I think that was the same year I made that, uh, the Fanatic or whatever. Have you guys seen The Fanatic?

What was the other really shitty movie that Travolta was in? I mean, he, he’s he’s done all shitty movies. You want me to pull up his imdb or Battle for New York or whatever it was? Oh, battlefield Earth. Yeah, that fucking turd. What the fuck was that? This was Battlefield Turd. Guys, I’m gonna blow your mind.

Name me. Three. Good John Travolta movies. Be cool. Okay. That one’s actually all right, Michael. Somebody’s gonna say Grease Pulp Fiction. Get Shorty. That’s the same franchise, that’s like Name me 10 good Vin Diesel [00:13:00] movies. Fast and Furious. Okay Eric, you were saying Pulp Fiction sucked though when we were talking about this previously.

So, but you’re gonna use it as a good movie now. I never said Pulp Fiction sucks. Eric is not a fan of Paul Fishing. I am not. I am not. It’s a good movie. I will agree that it’s a good movie. No, not being a fan of it is different sword. Swordfish was a good movie. Swordfish. I’m gonna throw this out there.

And I said, this movie highlighted one thing that I didn’t have any awareness of prior to this. His team, Travolta’s? No, Travolta’s. Acting’s not that good. What the cast around him are, what make the movies what they are. In my opinion, I’m, I’m gonna say it true. His, his, he’s always got that same kind of, I’m super cool thing about him.

Yeah. When he’s really too cool for school. Yeah, yeah. Like cool’s literally in the title of the movie. I mean, even in Paul Fiction, he was kind of, he Urban Cowboy. That was nobody’s top movie. What? Hello? So he hasn’t made a good movie since 2004. So is what I’m hearing right. He was in Punisher in 2004. Oh yeah.

He was the bad guy in Punisher. Yeah, the Thomas. The Thomas. Yeah. I think that’s When Be Cool came out too. It was like oh 4, 0 5, something like that. Be [00:14:00] cool. Was a lot of fun. Don’t, don’t be dis No, he was in, he was in that Wild Hogs movie. He sure was. He, he was also in, look who’s talking now? It doesn’t matter.

uh, they had so much budget to work with. Apparently they wasted it all on the writer. , how much did they spend on this film? I couldn’t find it, but I’m just looking at it like, I mean, having Travolta and stuff involved, it’s gotta be like eight to 10 million at least. Right. The guy Shania what? Oh, Shania was like free.

She, it was probably filmed in Canada. Shania works for Fried Chicken . It was filmed in Shania’s Backyard. That’s why she’s in it. She’s like, y’all filming a movie here? Oh wait, Steve, I have a fun fact here with the Cooks. Do you wanna know what the US Gross was on this movie? What was that? $0. Zero? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, so it opened up in Ecuador, I guess, and made almost seven grand. I don’t know. Yeah. I wonder. My Netflix fees keep going up each month. I mean, they’re losing money hand over fist. . It is shockingly 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, 31% with the audience, which I found [00:15:00] shocking. I mean, one person gets it up to 31%, right?

There’s only three. Yeah. It’s probably because of the cameos. They’re like, oh my God, it’s that guy. Oh no, it’s her. Look at that. Is that Barry Corbet? Holy shit. That’s like Stan. Anyway, , had any of you guys on here heard of this movie prior to recently? Nope. I never heard of it prior to it being brought up.

I mean, the best part of Dan’s, you know, review of this, you know, he took issue with things that I would’ve never thought to take issue with. . He found inaccuracies never. And inaccuracies. I mean, he really studied this movie because remember he prepared, he watched it three entire times. . So where is he?

What? But here’s the best part. Not only did he watch it three times, One time with no sound. It wasn’t there, it a very minimal sound. What, why, what was it better? Because he just wanted to feel the emotion of the like, phenomenal cinema. That’s when he realized [00:16:00] Travolta’s face wasn’t moving. . You pick up the real details when it’s a silent film.

Oh my god, you guys, John Travolta has been replaced with an anime character. We have to go free him. Oh my God. All right, well, speaking of, uh, I don’t know.

Oh my God. I was gonna say, uh, this movie was filmed in Hueytown and Bessemer, Alabama. Not Talladega, but apparently, uh, Hueytown is the hometown of NASCAR’s, Alabama Gang. Guys, what the hell is that? Don’t look at me. Is that Alabama game? Like we got gang or, uh, gang like, uh, Oh gang. Yeah. Yeah. G a n g. Like a, like a group of individuals I guess.

Got it, got it. So real quick, Steve, your mission, where it was filmed we’re at in Alabama, did you say? Hueytown and Bessemer. But Hueytown is the Alabama gang thing. Anderson cuz the Talladega short track, which is an actual dirt track there in Alabama, is in [00:17:00] a place called Isa Boga. I’m probably pronouncing that wrong, but it’s E A S T A B O G A.

Yeah. That’s Isa Boga. This was one of two movies that Travolta filmed in the Greater Birmingham, Alabama metropolitan area during March of 2018. So apparently he did two movies in a month. The other was The Fanatic, which starts off with him saying, can we wrap this up? I got a Poo . That’s his first line in the mo.

Okay. If you guys haven’t seen the Fanatic, check it out. It is a horrible movie. It’s directed by Fred Durst. Yes. That Fred Durst from One Bizkit. What? Fred Durst. Is it about a fanatic? It is about a mentally handicapped individual played by John Travolta, who I guess meets someone. He idolizes, played by Devin Saa, like, like some sort of celebrity or whatever that he’s like kind of obsessed with.

Never Go full simple, Jack. And Yeah, yeah, yeah. pretty much it’s, [00:18:00] it’s a, it What if Simple Jack wanted to kidnap a celebrity and hygiene and zoo who watched Tropic Thunder and said, we gotta make that movie. We gotta make that, but cross it with that fan movie that had Wesley Snipes and, uh, Robert de Ni.

You remember that, right? Five people watched it. simple, Jack , . We gotta make simple Jack, it’s gonna sell. Trust me. You gotta tell that backstory. We gotta unpack that onion. Holy cow. So the way I looked at this was it came out in 2019 probably to nobody’s, you know, recollection, obviously. And then we somehow missed it during Tiger King and every other stupid film that we were watching on Netflix, it slipped through the cracks, and here we are three years later when Tanya brought it to our attention goes, have you seen this Travolta movie that’s in the ads on Netflix?

I mean, they’re pumping this thing hard. It pops up on my like Recomme. Films even [00:19:00] before I started watching it. I’m like, why I don’t watch that many racing films? This is weird. That just means you’re watching horrible movies on a regular basis. Oh, oh God, you’ve been bitching Travolta . That’s how we found so many Nicholas Cage movies on Netflix at one point.

It’s like, Hey, you watched Nicholas Cage movie? Here’s the other 25 that we got for free at a yard sale. Okay, guys, I have to mention this. I put in racing movies to like look up other ones like jog my memory of one. Thanks Google. Popular Racing movies, I’m assuming, based on my search, number one is Trading Paint followed By, or B Ferrari, followed by Speed Kills another John Travolta movie Made the year before about speedboats cars

Yeah. Yeah, they’re, they’re listening. For me. Where? Speed Racer Rad. Death Race. The Jason Statham won. Yeah. Days of Thunder. Days of Thunder. Herbie fully loaded. Ben. Her . Oh yeah, Ben her. But it’s not Cars Need for speed. Fast Company. [00:20:00] 1979. Yeah, that one. After a sponsor replaces him with his arch rival race car Driver decides to steal a car and race it himself.

Starring William Smith. Oh yeah. William Smith from Champaign and Bullets. And also Conan’s dad, the last Travolta movie I watched, everybody’s going, oh, Saturday Night Fever. No, I watched Killing Season with Robert De Niro because I thought the premise from the trailer, much like the trailer of this movie.

I was like, ah, maybe this could be interesting. This would be good. It was also horrendous. But you know what I took away from that? Travolta really grew. He really blossomed. He. A veteran actor, you know, pulp Fiction, Saturday Night Fever, all this kinda stuff. But he really transcended from killing season to this movie because what I noticed is that the hair implants that he was working on during that film have taken root and you know, he’s looking good now looking more natural.

Nice John Travolta’s, country accent. And his demeanor in this movie was like John [00:21:00] Travolta was playing Michael Scott playing a country guy, . Does he have dentures? Because, I mean, Dan and I were laughing about his terrible southern accent. His inflections were totally wrong. It just, I’ve never heard a monotone southern accent before.

Now I think he had fake teeth in like whether he has dentures or not. I definitely think he had fake teeth in for this for some reason. And what’s up with his beard? Could he manscape a little bit? Do you guys notice the splotchy patches in his cheeks? Like, is that like, The residual hair. Hey, not everybody can grow a beard.

Yeah, yeah. Say Dylan pointed out here in killing season. His beard was epic. It was sprayed out of a can. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m sure. Sure. They had the stencil, held it over his face . His Russian accent was terrible there too. I’m guessing he can’t grow a proper beard because his face is plastic because did you notice in this movie, his face does not move at all?

All of his facial acting expressions are in like little twitches in his eyes. That’s the only part [00:22:00] of his face that moves is his little eyes to eye movements. He was being a strong southern, serious man. , fine southern gentlemen. John Wayne was a strong, serious southern man, and his acting chops were way above this.

It drops you right in like a lot of dramatic films were right in the action, right where at Talladega. Dirt oval. Short course . Well, yeah. When they said, we’re here, here live at Talladega, I’m like, get the fuck outta here. That’s somebody’s backyard. You were writing a note when it popped up. Short course.

Yeah. Oh yeah. Short course. And then, uh, like Izzy was looking it up and it’s like, oh yeah, short courses are like a sixth of a mile. And they’re like 50 laps. And I’m like, so the race is what, six to eight minutes? An insanity? Yeah. Like ten second laps. Right. I mean, it’s just bonkers. They were Talladega.

Parking lot. . Here we’re at Talladega parking lot. Parking garage. Here we are at Talladega soap and says, let’s get your car washed in [00:23:00] 30 seconds. . Yeah. Oh my God. The announcers. The announcers. Eric, you and I could be dirt track announcers. I found after watching this. We could be dirt track announcers.

Hundred percent. I’m ready for the challenge, man. Oof, oof. Yeah, we, we were making jokes whenever the announcers were coming on. Like there were the announcers from over the top where it’s like, and by the way, this is a double elimination tournament. I really would hate to be the young son of that arm wrestler right there.

Yeah. The drama between him and his father, crew chief and his big rival, Bob Leadfoot. Linsky . I’m like, if I were listening to this at a, at a racetrack, I’d be like, Shut up. Just tell us who’s in the lead. . . It’s a Redwater, the blue one. . I immediately took issue with the audio of the cars and then Dan kept telling me, oh no, that’s what they sound like.

And I’m like, what a Honda with a fart can. I’m like, these things sound terrible. How dare you? How? How dare you say that about my Honda . I mean, it [00:24:00] was like even the choreography of the driving when they were in the cars looked like 1960s Batman, you know, where it’s like kind of mopping around in the background.

I was like, what is this? The out scenes were okay, like what they shot was probably of an actual race at whatever that, you know, backwards dirt track that they filmed it at was. So that was like legitimately Okay. The one where they were doing just 20 miles an hour. Well, yeah. So you noticed that too, right?

Yeah, yeah. , they couldn’t even like try to make, shoot it to look fast. So the first 15 minutes of this 84 minute film, I guess is supposed to set the stage. Yeah, we basically, we see him racing the final lap. We see a guy, we don’t know who this is, it’s like Cameron Monroe and I, her window, wait, did you just say Cameron Poe?

The, the, the, the star of Con Air? No, no, it’s Cam Monroe. But then, yeah, the engine blows Boo uh, fizzles out and the other guy wins. And we’re supposed to be like, okay, cool, we lost a race. They’re like, no. You know, his father’s his crew chief and he lost the biggest rival Bob Lip Olinsky, who owns all the car [00:25:00] dealerships in town apparently, cuz no one ever leaves Talladega and, and everything down the, the sun looks like a poor man’s Colin Farrell here at the beginning.

And then it’s suddenly like, all right, y’all, I gotta go to work. Yes. He was like, deuces, get my son’s car. I gotta go. Yeah. I was like, what? What the hell’s going on? I mean, he is not Robert Duval. It’s not like, Y’all, you can come on down here and get some ice cream. You know, it wasn’t any of that, which is what I was expecting, but nope, nope, nope.

So he had to go to work. Well, the best part of it is he says he has to go to work. Cops in the truck, you see him drive off. We then cut to the scene of an accident and I’m like, holy shit, did I just kill Travolta ? They should have, it would’ve been a more interesting movie if they had . Yeah. Apparently he’s a tow truck driver and he’s just, you know, going to work.

Okay. Are we talking about the accident accident or the, the flashback accident? Well, it’s the same scene. Yeah. Say it’s a real accident and he is sitting there watching like, you know, like, oh, we’re about ready for you. But then it’s like, then we flashback to another accident because we see [00:26:00] them load up a very alive old man onto a stretch, like into the back of an uh, E M T truck.

And then he has the flash. So the flashback, he’s riding in a car with a woman. They’re going down the road pretty fast, whatever, all this kind of thing. I immediately had that flashback to the scene with Brendan Frazier and Doom Patrol, where he, he takes out his wife and you know, that’s how he becomes a robot man when he goes under the semi.

I said, oh, I see where this is going. Right. The part that I took issue with, I don’t know if you guys noticed or not, they had a couple different cut shots of the accident, because I guess that’s Travolta’s dead wife is what we’re supposed to figure out from this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they’re kissing in the car, which was okay, whatever.

And then you see him swerve around that Jeep pulls into oncoming traffic and then swerves and he t-boned the car in front of him. Exactly. Yeah. That, yeah. You’re a dirt track driver knows how to drift, made no sense at all. Yeah. Luckily we go from there to, we see [00:27:00] a, a mysterious car under a cover in a garage somewhere that he’s looking at and I’m like, so did he take the wreckage home with him or, I know this is gonna be the fast and furious thing where it’s like his dad’s car or the car he killed his wife in or something.

But it’s not gonna tell us that till third act. Okay. Whatever. Checkoffs cars there, , then we cutoff’s car . That scene was taken completely out of Fast and Furious. A hundred percent. It was, yeah. There’s a lot of tropes in this movie for sure. And then we cut to, uh, fishing with Shania Twain. Okay, so you’re Brad Pitt.

That don’t impress me much.

And, and I’m like, so is this his new wife or what? Right. It’s especially weird when like, we don’t get her name until like the third act. What’s the way they were talking? It was like a first date. Um, it’s almost sounded like a first date. I literally turned to Mount Manan and I said, you’ve watched [00:28:00] this movie twice already without me.

What in the hell is going on? And he just does his little mountain lap. You’re gonna figure it out, right? And I’m like, dude, who is this chick? Like what is, why did we go from this death scene and that we’re fishing? I get that. She’s Shania Twain. Well, I don’t know her name. I don’t know why they’re there.

like I, but you know what we do find out? The name of the person. She divorced. She divorced is Steve. Big fucking mistakes. Steves are the best. Steves are the best. Steves are the worst. Jesus. Bring up one bad Steve. Uh, I can name like five that I’ve used to work for. Terrible. Steves terrible fucking people.

It’s, it’s probably their middle name. Then their last one, Winer alert. She isn’t actually real. This is some sixth sense and it’s the vision of his dead wife the whole time. We’re in the Matrix. . Anyone else ever talk to her during the movie? I see dead people. Cam talks to her though. Cam talks to her? Or was that just Sam Younger?

Since we went from the flashback to this, I thought [00:29:00] that for a second. , I’m not gonna lie. Like is he talking to his dead wife? Is that like just out fishing? Yeah. I, I didn’t know what was going on. Yeah, . That would’ve been a much more interesting movie. But then we go to Dan’s first favorite part of the film.

What happens next? Dan, do you remember when they’re in the red Dodge pickup truck? When he is there on the date by the pond talking to Shania cuz she speaks to something about teaching and he talks about getting in trouble for doing donuts at the school. And she’s like, well, what’s Donuts? And he takes her out in the truck and he is like, I’ve never done this before.

And it’s like you just said, you got in trouble for, and you’re gonna be doing it in a field and tell her you’ve never gone it before. And other than that, like who doesn’t know what donut a donut is? Yeah. That was two things wrong with this movie. It’s like, what are donuts Like Are you from Iceland or something?

I it. That’s the only Canada excuse. Canada. Canada. Okay. Oh, you know what, that does make sense now. Canada, what do they call donuts in Canada? Loonies. I don’t know. Tims Horton’s. It’s a croissant. Yeah, course. Can I get a Horton, a dozen Hortons [00:30:00] poutine? Who cares? I was kidding. Shout out to our Canadian listener, to the one Canadian listener that we have.

Gotta go down to the Tim Horton. But you know, I will say, Dan turns to me and he goes, you know, I’ll take issue with him driving a Dodge. I dog really . He’s a Ford man. Like I’m offended by him driving that. Their ram. This is a Ford movie. Yeah. Now that’s not what I said. I said it’s pretty sad that he’s supposedly a Ford guy, but his daily driver’s a Dodge.

That’s all I was saying. Uhhuh . Uhhuh . Well, cause he actually wants to tow the trucks instead of, you know, become part of the problem. . Oh, shit. Kidding. I, I’m just kidding. This movie is brought to you by Ford. That’s why I say that. Yeah, right. Sha Rock. Shania sets the record straight. Racing. Ain’t no hobby.

Did she say that or did he say that? . [00:31:00] Ok. It doesn’t matter. It was sad. Travolta said, I think racing’s like the, one of the most expensive hobbies. It’s like that and getting a boat. Oh, oh. It’s up there with simply tossing money into an inferno. That’s about the same thing. That whole dinner scene, the fishing scene, I mean, were they on a date?

I wasn’t sure they kept having these awkward, intimate hugs, like maybe Travolta’s whole body has been Botox. Cuz he’s so stiff. Like I don’t, yeah, . I don’t get it. He was definitely a robot through like the whole movie. And like Brad said earlier, the monotone of him, he had no emotion. And like at the very beginning open scene where Cam took the lead, his excitement was so minimal.

It’s like, no. If that was in real life, you’d be like jumping off the walls if your son took the lead on a championship break. Yeah. Go, go, go, go, go. Yeah. Did you guys also notice, because Dan and I were laughing pretty hard about this, he can’t move his neck. Yeah. He moves his shoulders and his head. So he really is like the robot [00:32:00] man.

Like I, I don’t know if he’s got something physically wrong. Yeah. He may have had neck surgery or something. I, I, I mentioned that John Travolta is in his seventies. Let’s, I mentioned that too, that I didn’t think he could move his neck. Yeah. Yeah, he did. Cause I was like, oh yeah, he is moving like that man.

Yeah. Guy guys. Time comes for us all . Yeah. Right. So after that, State of nothing. Yeah. The next part’s like we see, uh, cam the son and he is like talking with his wife outside of the trailer. And I guess she was like going to work and he was coming home from work to like watch the kid or something. I don’t know what, but he is basically like, man, if I’m gonna make something outta of this rating, I, I might have to go, uh, you know, drive for, uh, Bob Lansky’s team instead of my dad’s.

But, but that’s your biggest rival and family’s thicker than money or I, I don’t know, some stupid shit like that. Family. Family blood is thicker than cash? No, no. I can definitely plug a blood hole with some cash. I can definitely soak up some blood with some cash, but it’s [00:33:00] called. Yeah. So this kicks off the whole estrangement process.

Right? It’s the whole like, big chunk of the film, right? The rift between him and his dad, the whole schism, whatever, you know, fancy vocabulary words you want to use there. We needed a plot. Yeah, right. But it’s the only $10 word we can use for this movie. So we’ll just go with that. I just don’t understand, like, so, okay, so the next scene, they’re back at the track, right?

So now he’s driving for Linsky and that whole drama and, and everything. Well, no, you gotta have the blowout where he actually tells his dad too. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he, he like goes to the tow company or whatever and he is like, Hey dad. So, um, uh, I think I’m gonna race for Bob Linsky and the dad.

Just like, what do you think a championship is worth more than family or loyalty? Oh, this is, oh, whatever. Get outta here. You’re fired. Oh, hold on. . He’s like, walk. He’s like, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. You’re fired . And that’s like the end of the scene. It was like that line . I thought I raised you better than this.

Yeah. You ain’t never gonna find work again in this one horse [00:34:00] town. No, I just told you I got a better job. . Yeah, right. With your worst enemy. Were you not listening ? So he’s fired or quit or whatever. Oh, and like his wife is there like in the parking lot too. I was like, wait, does she work there? Like, she was right there when it happened.

He is like, I was going to tell you first , but I didn’t. And she’s like, what happened? He came, no, no, no. Came in, he came into the restaurant and then she like left out the back and got in her truck and was like, I’m going home. Which I didn’t understand why, why did she leave her job? Like what now? We’re both unemployed.

this baby’s gonna be addicted to meth before you know it. So when did the high school bathroom scene happen? I, I had that written down high school. Oh, that, that, that was in like some like retirement party or something. That was like the award ceremony, right? Yeah. They had a whole fallen out there. Yeah.

And I’m just like, skip that. That was a, yeah, I think that was like the lifetime achievement award for the guy who was. Doing the speech in the background that they kept fading out. Yeah. Cam came out of the bathroom and he went to Cindy and he was like, I just got in a fight with my dad. We gotta go [00:35:00] like, oh God, you did that again.

I didn’t even see it as a fight. He was, they talked, maybe they raised their voices a little bit. Yeah, but he ca he was so dramatic. I just got in a fight with my dad. We gotta go. We gotta go now. By the way, when they were having the argument there in the shitter, I just wanted somebody in the background to be like, shut the fuck up.

Some of us are trying to drop logs here. I’m trying to poop. Fuck you. Shorey . It’s Canadian, right? Yeah. Michael Matson’s trying to pinch a loaf and he is like, will you pany? Shut the fuck up, . And then we get a wonderful scene of Sam, you know John Travolta at the bar drinking and his uh oh man, buddy Stumpy comes over and he is like, oh man.

So he had a rough day. Hey. We should go fishing. This character Jack comes over and is just a pure a hole. The, I done heard something about your boy leaving Go race for Linsky and blah, blah blah. By the way, [00:36:00] Jack apparently also races for Linsky. we find out later, but not in this particular scene. He’s the Cobra Kai of this particular movie.

He’s going, he’s gonna sweep the leg. Johnny put him in a potty bag. Yeah, he’s that guy. A hundred percent . So yeah. Triple to dexon. Fuck. That was the saddest. Spar Fight cliche Trop scene I have ever seen, if that was bottled, it would be weak sauce . It was. It was the weakest knockout punch I’ve ever seen.

It was like slow motion with his robot movement. I looked at it and I was like, man, that dude has such a glass jaw that week of a punch. Knocked him out. It was epicly terrible, but it was expected. Alright, we’re in a small southern town, we’re dirt track racing. We got the girlfriend, not girlfriend, we got the, the rift between the dad we’re driving tow trucks, all this stuff, yeehaw, and here we are in the bar scene getting smashed.

Which he really wasn’t on like, you know, Bartles and James or something. I dunno what the hell he was drinking, but that whole scene was like so forced in there, like it [00:37:00] had to be in there. You know what I mean? It’s like we gotta have the bar scene. It would’ve been nicer if Lansky had walked in, like the guy from Talladega Knight, you know, the uppity Formula One dude, like it had gone down like that.

He’ll do anything. Pancakes. Yeah, exactly. But it just, it lost all of the potential that it had almost immediately. I don’t know if it was immediately after or several hours later, that Stumpy offers to drive John Travolta home. As they’re walking to the car, I’m like, oh no. We’re gonna get another accident.

Blast be flashed back to later. They’re both drunk, right? ? I’m a little less drunk than you. It’s alright. . Yeah, right. I can stay between the lines at least. You just tell me when to turn the scene you’re talking about. Were stumpy’s walking tra bolts out to the truck to take ’em home. The worst thing about it, if you look at it, he’s walking perfectly fine.

No limp or anything. And you later. His name is Stumpy because he’s missing part of his leg. If you wanted to do this right, have a little bit of a limp or something [00:38:00] as you’re walking tra volts out. I said, but you’re walking perfectly normal on every other scene, except for when they’re talking about him having it.

It wasn’t until after that he actually has a little bit of a limp in a scene later on. No, they were trying to keep it as a surprise. You know that surprise reveal of surprise. It was a stump the whole time. It wasn’t just a clever nickname. Yeah, his nickname Stumpy was before he lost the leg. . Yes. . Uh oh.

How oddly Prophetic. We’ll get to that part later. All right, so my favorite scene comes next. There’s the favorite scene. Well, Dan and I enjoyed this scene because it is the only bit of levity throughout the whole film. It makes no sense, but it needs to be there because let’s face it, the rest of this film sucks.

So you get this call in radio show like a seven 80 am in the middle of Kansas or wherever the hell they are, and Sheriff Buck Taylor comes on the air. Racing is in our blood. With me today is Sam the man, Monroe, doing his whole thing. And that old lady that called in, I mean Dan, Dan and I were [00:39:00] cracking up cuz that was like the best thing ever, especially at the end of her little story.

And he goes, Well, maam, that gives you a free pass for speeding tickets, . I was just like right on brother. Wasn’t Cam listening to it at work for Bob Linsky? Yeah. Yeah, that’s right. So it was before the accident, but yeah, it was pretty damn good. . Oh yeah, because Cam and uh, like three other guys are working on a car there at Linsky shop listening to it.

and like I’m assuming she works in the office, like HR type person’s out there. Here’s a walks away and then Linsky comes out cuz all of ’em are kind of giggling about the lady that called in and Linsky comes over, picks the radio up and slams it to the ground and breaks it to a million pieces and then just like walks out.

Speaking of non-committal relationships and women who get no names. I was thinking that woman was like the trophy wife of Linsky. I thought that too, but then was like, oh, she works there. Is she just like a sidepiece or is she just a secretary? Because she doesn’t matter at all in this movie other than that one scene.

She’s the secretary. Come on. He could have thrown his trophy wife of bone to make her feel [00:40:00] good working in the shop. He kisses the one lady after he won the one race and I couldn’t tell if it was her or not. Right. So I’m not sure. Oh yeah, yeah. Maybe it was her. Well I guess we’ll just have to watch it for a fourth time.

Am I right ? No. Let us know. We go back to the track several times during this span of, I don’t know what the hell’s going on in the movie at this point. We’ll call it Act two, right? Yeah. We get a whole bunch of stuff about him. Like I, I don’t know. For some reason he goes to check out the wreckage at the racetrack, and I don’t know, whenever I see this pointless kind of a scene where like there’s nobody around, somebody kneels down and like puts their hand next to a piece of metal on the ground.

I just think of a, was it the fourth Fast and Furious when Dominic Totos like, Imagining what happened based on like a paint skit on the road. , like, I think you skipped something really big. If we’re talking about him kneeling with wreckage. . Oh yeah, we did. Yeah, we did. That’s what I was getting to. Which is Oh yeah, yeah.

Oh shit. He starts racing against his son, but the probably most important part of [00:41:00] that whole segment there, which seemed like it took a hundred years, but it was probably only five minutes due to the length of this film, is that when he is in testing, he’s like, oh, you got that old dog, that old, you know, Chevy, blah blah blah, this and that.

And it’s like all this stuff and the car’s a complete turd. We already know that It blew up at the beginning of the movie. Yeah. And he is like, you guys silly. I’m still gonna send it. I’m gonna show these suckers how fast I am, you know, and then he goes out. And he obliterates everybody. Yes. That bothered me too.

I’m like, your son left because your car’s a turd and can’t win. And then you take the car out and it’s like Grease lightning. . Literally . I what I was saying, like at this point I’m like screaming at the tv, like take a year off, build a better car. Let your son race for the competition. Then have your son leave the competition for you and then obliterate them like, come on, steal all their secrets, and then leave.

Take all that money and buy the new motor. Yes. That sounds like a much longer movie. Yeah, that I didn’t want to see. They gotta say something for the sequel. [00:42:00] Am I right? That’s true. Oh my god. Based on that four figure return. . All right, so he’s racing against his son, and then there’s a scene in another nighttime race.

Like all of them are in dirt track. He gets something that we know in our world as the red mist, which is you kind of get the blinders on, you get angry, you get super focused, and you’re just chasing the taillights in front of you. Right? So we have that whole scene, Johnny, to sweep the leg from the bar scene Takes his revenge.

Y’all are skipping so much. Yeah. Yeah. You’re skipping. Oh, what did, what did I miss? I must have slept through it. Well, he beats ly these guys first. Yeah, say there’s the whole race where Sam wins. Whoops. Everybody’s butt. Another chat with Shania talking about selling the like 70 Mustang that he has.

That’s the car. We get a little peak of the car under the cover and it’s a 70 Mustang that I guess he bought for his wife after his fifth championship. Don’t learn that till later. , the big thing before the point Eric’s [00:43:00] getting to is the fact that Linsky tries to get Cam to wreck his dad because Linsky didn’t make the final, the main event for that particular race.

And he’s like, look, your dad’s getting too far ahead of me in points. I need you to take him out. And of course Cam didn’t do it, which led up to what Eric was about to say. Sweep the leg Jon, sweep the leg. , I mean, God. Yeah. So that whole racing goes down and as expected bumps, the quarter panel spins ’em around, blah, blah, blah.

And then. Wait, wait a second though. Can we go back to that scene? Because that dude was like flying 20 miles an hour around the track like everybody else whatever speed they were doing and then dude like basically comes to a stop. Everyone else is still going the same speed. And then right at the point that Cam is like side by side, dudes are like warp drive and he’s like back up the speed and it’s like side by side and then can like tap him and spin him like f you

Look, it’s a lot easier to go to warp speed to a sudden stop when it’s [00:44:00] only 20 miles an hour. Like you can do it like 20 feet. That is very, very true. And then top back out like within three seconds. Where was the blue flagger out there? Where were the flagger? Do they have flags in dirt track? Dan? I don’t know.

Daniel. They do at the start and finish line. O. Okay. Red flag, green flag. We got it. and white flag. Or in checker flag? Well, it should have been a white flag for that guy. Slow moving vehicle. No white flag’s. One lap to go in. Dirt track racing. Come on. That’s the only time you use it. You, well, he should’ve got a meatball then.

Don’t be bringing that European sports car nonsense to this fine Talladega short track. They can only handle making left turns. Don’t throw anything more confusing in there if they can’t handle the right turn. I mean, I gotta say the racing, the movie, the Disney movie cars was more exciting than this says for sure.

Don’t you dare. Blast. Theme Cars is a wonderful or whatever. Jijiga. . I mean, that’s a great movie. Okay, because of Michael Keaton. Yes. Now [00:45:00] cars too. You can trash out all you want, but original cars. Watch a goddamn hell. So let’s get back to this wannabe days of thunder scene. Oh, when Cams on fire, save. I’m on fire.

Hey, cam is on fire. I’m on fire cruise. I mean, we knew it was coming, right? We knew the plan. We knew Johnny was gonna sweep the leg. The spin was coming. What I didn’t expect much to Tanya’s point from earlier about even the accident with the wife, you think Travolta’s reaction would’ve been not to T-bone his son in the middle of the track?

No. Instead, what does he do? I don’t know if he downshifted, but I mean he sped up and just rammed it full speed ahead. I was like, seriously? Did you even try? You’d think also, and I don’t speak from any experience, I haven’t even watched short track race in person, but the track is so short as its name says , that you would be Ha hey, be able to have seen him.

Mm-hmm. situational awareness. How [00:46:00] dare you. As you were coming around the turn, I know they made it as though the guy in front of him suddenly moved and then it was like boom, he was there. The other guy somehow was able to swerve at the last second. But , it’s not Travolta. Nope. Depending on placement on the track.

Cuz if you’re coming around a turn, you’re basically drifting around the turn. If you’re in that drift and the car’s there, you’re kind of set to where you either turn the wheel to the left and spin out to where your ass and your car hits him, or you just maintained your course and you’re gonna hit ’em.

He was already going straight. That’s true. He was going straight by them a little bit. The whole race. They looked like they were going straight. Yeah. I didn’t see any, any skidder cars out there at all. They were going straight the whole time. Did he hit ’em like a missile? 20 mile an hour missile? Well, when you’re only going 20 miles an hour, it’s hard to show ’em skidding cuz they’re not really skidding.

Right, exactly. The impact blew, like the car in half Cam’s, car was in half this. It was insane. To which the whole car is a freaking roll bar. He should have been dead. If that was a real impact, it would’ve killed him. But what? He would’ve been dead. But luckily [00:47:00] his dad was there to dive in and save him and poem him from the wreck.

Yeah, because that was medically safe. Yeah. Yeah. His dad definitely totally didn’t just break his back there. So in the whole scene when like the race is like shut down because they’re like saving him or whatever. There’s a scene where I, I think it was like stumping was like walking onto the track and we see like jack in the car and he is like looking down, blah, blah, blah.

I was expecting Stumpy to like walk up, snap his neck, roll credits. Guys, what do we think of this movie? . . Fuck with my friend. Clock . You know, like that’s my Ken, what he kept saying, that’s my, that’s my son. That’s my son. Like whatever a big baffling thing is. The only injuries that Cam gets outta this is some broken legs.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Were they really broken? He was walking on fracture. Right? Okay, come on because let’s go back to your timeline problem here. Cuz if he had broken his legs, he would’ve missed an entire other season. That kid would’ve been like eight years old by the end of this [00:48:00] movie if we follow any sort of logic.

The first race back, they said it’d been six months since he was in a car. So he’s very fast. He’s like Guy. Some of that X-Men regeneration type stuff. Wolverine, they’re athletes, guys. I mean, you see football players break a leg and be back by the playoffs. Called drugs zone shots. Oh yeah. There’s no drugs in NASCAR or dirt racing.

Yeah, they just don’t test for cocaine. . Yeah. Yeah. There’s definitely no drugs involved in going in a quarter mile circle a hundred times until you throw up. They don’t be testing for meth. That’s what Steve was saying about the short track. He’s like, I can Carson her for like the eighth laugh. That’s like the equivalent of like putting your head on the baseball bat and like trying to run around it like 50 times.

I mean, that’s a sport I guess he blew in a vehicle. There we go. But the thing with that accident baffle me is his legs were broken, but the impact was on the back of the car. You think the impact would’ve been to the front of the car? Don’t question the science. They already [00:49:00] did the math for you. It didn’t have, I think he had another injury too.

I thought there was something like ribs, honey. Ribs. Yeah. . It was his back cuz his dad pulled him out of a burning car. Right. Crushed his ribs on the way out. He, he was filled with rage, thought he was jack and. Oh no. That must have happened during the crash. Sorry, son. Eric is still dying. . . We broke. Eric.

Eric, Eric. Breathe buddy. You got this. He got this. Eric’s envisioning the baseball bats . He’s just picturing, he’s just picturing Travolta and his son doing all those races and then trying to run. I think we should redo this movie. And then each of the racing scenes should just be us doing that. Yes. Oh, here’s how you make NASCAR interesting.

You start every race with them outside of the car, doing 20 laps around the baseball bat, and then trying to get to the car instead of the Lamont star. It’s the Talladega star. Yeah. . [00:50:00] Yeah. The literal slugger start every pit stop, they take a hit off a beer bong or whatever and then it’s like, alright, I’ll see you in 30 now this is a race I wanna see.

I’d watched NASCAR if they did this shit. , NASCAR hit me up. I’ve got notes, , oh my god, they are hurting a rating. So would definitely benefit them. . Alright, so uh, one up Samir. Yeah. So we got like, so wait, wait, wait, wait. So Cam is in the hospital now, right? Yeah, yeah. From this traumatic baseball, bad injury or whatever.

Apparently you didn’t pay on time , so unfortunately this was another just classic. Trope, right? It was the Prodigal Sun Hospital scene confessional. I was like, oh, really? Like we’re gonna go there. Like this is how it’s gonna play out. Yeah, of course. You guys are so accepting of it. . Yeah, apparently they had seen Driven too in Days of Thunder and all the other, dare [00:51:00] I say, better racing movies, Laura.

I mean, at least Travolta wasn’t running a sweet and low packet up his son’s leg or whatever. I mean, you know, we , wouldn’t it have been Jello in a Halo Hospital pool? , yeah. Give me some ice cream. Lemme show you how. Take that turn. Then we pan back to Shania again, which I continue to ask Dan, what is her name?

Shania. Well, true, true. But in the movie, we have no clue still. So there’s that whole awkward hug scene, cams in the hospital, the whole thing, blah, blah, blah. And it’s just like, I literally asked him, I was like, , are they friends? Are they neighbors? Are they friends with benefits? Like what the F is going on?

Very immature relationship. That can’t be defined by boyfriend, girlfriend, basically. Eric wants to know if they’re fucking or not. That’s Oh, they’re definitely fucking, yeah. Right. Definitely. Is it that point or is it the, like he’s still holding in his farts around her. What? Where are we in this way? It can be both, Steve.

No, no. It really can’t. [00:52:00] Well, not, I started getting that motion going. Guess what? You might a little nitro.

No, see, see what you’ve missed this whole time is his arc of he is still grieving over his decade. Old dead white. Well that’s, that was so long ago. Yeah. Yeah. So that was So Steve, he could look, that was, that was back during, uh, phenomenon or something. That was some other. Steve, listen, he’s got a sad sob story.

Oh yeah. That’s how he gets it in. He’s got, he’s got a garage to park it in. Yeah. without having to pay rent. , . I’ll contend that maybe the woman that died in the opening scene isn’t the wife. She just might be the baby mama because he’s so non-committal with Shania. We don’t know if he was married or not.

No, Eric. Eric. What we’re saying is if you have the sad story, it’s like why buy the cow when you get the sex for free? . Sorry, I missed that point. I’m so, I’m still . I had this other vision of a baseball [00:53:00] bat and spinning. It’s just, it’s outta, whoa. I mean, I don’t know what Walter’s penis looks like. Uh, . All right.

We need to stop. Where? Where is this conversation going? This is, wait, this is rated E, right? We’re talking about, we’re talking about mature adult relationships. Come on. I mean, I mean, we’re on everything I learned from movies, right? I mean, this is everything I learned from porn, . Yeah. Sad story gets it in.

That’s definitely one of our major things. We’ve learned that, and the net is the ultimate weapon. The relationship was defined in the beginning. They’re donut friends.

Oh. So Eric’s gonna put on repeat at his house. You love it so much now. I mean, I was scribbling notes and literally falling asleep at the same time. So I had a hard time rereading them, trying to remember how this went down. Uh, yeah. We get a whole thing where Sam goes and talks to Cam in the hospital and he is like, I’m sorry, I feel like I pushed you away and you’re a good man, a [00:54:00] good father and a good husband if you can do that.

Well, that’s all it was going to be. Then, I don’t know, I just have written down, are you gonna join me again? And I’m like, seriously? Okay, whatever. It’s gonna be lots of work to get that car that you wrapped around a tree or whatever earlier in the movie. around this same time in the movie is a scene from one of the races that I think it might have been right before this.

The funny thing is Linsky wins or something and there’s this random guy that I guess is a fan or something, one of the commentators or something, and he grabs Linsky cowboy hat and like puts on on like, actually he is gonna walk away with it. And Eric’s reaction to that was hilarious. He’s like, What the hell’s that dude’s role?

didn’t fit anywhere in the movie, but it was just weird. His wings Houser here. That dude was the money. I think he was one of the sponsors or something like that. He was mellow yellow. He’s the guy that owns the car dealership and sponsors the race team and all that. Alinsky’s, just the figurehead? No, he’s holding the bank note.

He’s dang on the bank note in front of him, he’s the one that put 10 million into this movie only to get about seven grand back. He can have the damn hat if he wants it. Minus John [00:55:00] Travolta is 30% anyway. Oh yeah. So then we get the scene. Okay, so after having the teary hospital scene and all that, damn is going to talk to Bob and is basically like, Hey, uh, you made an offer to buy that uh, Mustang from me a while back.

Is that offer still standing? I’m. Well, how much was it for ? Like, are, are we talking like a hundred grand or like six grand? I, I don’t know. What, how long ago was that offer? The market has changed and, and he is basically like pay my son’s expenses and stuff in the hospital or you know, whatever the hell it’s for.

And he mentions he’s retiring too. And Bob’s like, well that’s too bad cuz uh, I wanted to win that championship and I wanna beat you. So I want you to keep racing and uh, then I’m going to beat you the old fashioned way. Having somebody else wreck you out? Yeah, pretty much . But Travolta had the exact same response I did and I was like, so are you buying the car or not?

Bob Vance. He did say the offer for was 50 grand. Oh, was it? 50 grand. Oh wow. Dan’s only watched a movie three times. He [00:56:00] hasn’t memorized, don’t forget. But we have to remind people the significance of this car. Yes. It was the one that he bought for his wife after he won his fifth championship. So what his wife died in, right.

It seemed like it, but no, it seemed like goes, oh my God, let’s go out for a drive. And that’s when the accident happened. But apparently it was like a week later in the runner car or something. But did anyone catch how, I thought they said the accident was in the rain and there was no rain in that flashback.

Yeah, it was. They didn’t mention it was in the rain. That was part of his sad story. So I assume he added that on and the years later, you know, to secure some Shania Twain. That don’t impress me much.

The movement got the church . That’s kinda like Stuy telling how he lost his leg with the length of the alligator. That was a, that was like eight foot. It is my leg at eight. I’m pretty sure it was 12 feet. It’s my story to tell. I’ll tell it as a 12 foot gator. You can tell it as an eight when you lose your leg.

The best part about the stumpy leg scene, [00:57:00] take that however you want to take it. is that it was the only exposition in the entire film. It was a complete yes. Thought it was a complete story and. Great. Now I know something about one character. I don’t know his real name. It’s just Stumpy , but I’ve got something to go on now I’m gonna assume that was the part written by the writer of Pumpkinhead

So are we saying Stumpy’s the most fleshed out character in this entire film? 1000%, yes. Excellent. Yeah, guys, we remember his name. It’s true. We had a struggle to think about camera or whatever, and uh, , I remember Cindy and Bob Linsky let put Bob Linsky, Bob Band, advance Refrigeration. So then we cut to, uh, Travolta jumping in the Mustang, doing some donuts at the school in front of, I guess where Shania teaches or something, because of course she’s an elementary school teacher.

Of course. All right. Did you guys catch the significance of the Mustang though as compared to previous episodes you’ve been on [00:58:00] with us? Was it a from another movie? Yeah. Well, similar. It was a Model up, but same Body Style as another movie. So now I’m testing your from God in 60 seconds. Yes, yes. Say that was.

Six. I thought it was a 60. Was it 67 Shelby or whatever. So not the Nicholas Cage one. The original gone in 60 seconds. Oh, it’s a, it’s a mock one version and his is a boss 3 0 2. So it’s just, you know, a package and it’s a horsepower, but it’s the same body style. Oh, okay. Okay. Sorry. I’ve seen the remake, let’s say conservatively a hundred times, but

But the original one I’ve seen like once . The Linsky one? Yeah. Just, just like the fast and ne furious. Yeah, yeah, exactly. The 1954 version and the, the one everybody’s familiar with. Oh. Oh, we’re not talking about Point break, which I’ve also seen a hundred times and it’s exact remake. Fast and Furious not Right.

That’s true. . And then, uh, the Bad Boys remake Fast and Furious too. Too fast. Too Furious. Remake of the gonna 60 sings. One of my favorite parts is when the, the swing and weight knocks [00:59:00] the Jeep Police vehicle through the wall. And he goes up and he’s like, are you okay? He’s like, yeah, I’m fine. He’s like, are you sure you just got knocked through a wall?

Timothy Aon, he’s fantastic. I mean, that bit of acting right there. Is 1000 times better than everything we witnessed for 84 minutes. Just that one little thing. I just have to say that, like, that trope of like, are you okay? Uh, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just did something amazing. Is one of like my favorites.

And Death to Moochy has the best scene at the end. Are you all right? I don’t know. It’s kind of fucked up to begin with.

Well, I got a question to ask y’all. Do you have a pretty penny? Jesus Christ? Is that a pretty mouse? Are you talking about my hole? I’m confused. A good night everybody. Good night. No, that’s what he kept asking him. That’s what he kept asking him about the uh, a Mustang trade. Do you have a pretty penny? Do you have a pretty penny?

Like how many times are you gonna [01:00:00] say it? It’s gonna cost him a pretty penny. Okay, I get it. You got an arm and a leg. You got an arm and a leg. Stump didn’t . I don’t got an arm and a leg. Do you have stump? You stay outta this . Stuffy’s, like that is ableist as fuck. . I don’t got an arm and a leg, but I got a 1950 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, panhead blah, blah, blah.

No, I, I ain’t got an arm and a leg, but I got two pretty pennies. Then you just rubb. It’s pronounced penis. You rubbed those pennies together then, okay, Uhhuh, , Stumpy’s, a whole new meaning. Now, was the big reveal before or after he bought the car. Which big reveal? Well, okay, so he gets the Mustang, he does the donuts, he then takes it to the racetrack and then to drop it off at the dealership.

And I’m like, well you just knocked 10 grand off that easy . You need to wash it. You’re gonna need to get that washed. Yeah, you gonna need to wash it. And then he goes to see Shania because I assume she’s like, what the fuck were you doing in front of my classroom early today? Hold on, hold, hold on a second.

Did he like [01:01:00] Uber from there? He walked. Ah, okay. Yeah, that’s why it’s nighttime. When he is in Shania, he just got home. It’s, it’s only a five mile radius. What we’re talking about here, small town thing is within five miles he hitchhiked on a tractor or something. And the only reason it’s all a five miles is cuz the racetrack takes about a half a mile of it.

it’s like half the town. Where’s that baseball bat again? But then we get the wonderful romantic scene where Sam is talking to Shania. I don’t even think we’ve found out her name’s Becca yet. And he is like, I think I love you. I think I’m in love with you. Okay. So what do you think? Your Elvis or something?

Whatever. . Okay, cool. Let’s talk about it tomorrow. I safe. You don’t have to say I was blown away. She did not. Yeah, that would’ve been perfect had she done the shush and then put her finger on his mouth or something. Cause it was, I mean, her reaction was so flat. Yeah. . Like all the acting in this movie, , [01:02:00] it was, I don’t know if it was natural, like that scene was adlibbed and she didn’t know what to say, but it was like, who literally.

Shania do not react. . Yeah. I mean, I’m like, I didn’t, I did get it. Like it was so awkward. She can say something like, I’m sorry I wasn’t listening. What? Can you say that again? . And then Sam’s like, ah, fuck it. Nevermind. Roll credits, guys. No . There were so many times this movie could have just ended and saved us The grief.

Yeah. At the beginning. . See, then we get the scene where Sam has 80 grand in cash that he is gonna offer from the Mustang. Right? I from the Mustang and I guess. Other stuff. Cause if, if he’s mentioned 50 grand earlier than, I don’t know, maybe another 30 lying around from suing Bob Linsky over, uh, trying to kill his son.

I don’t know. Bob, did Stumpy give him money because there was something about that? No. Yeah, yeah. Because yeah, stumpy ba ba basically he’s haggling with this other guy who I assume gonna be like a stock car driver. Cause [01:03:00] he’s not that great of an actor. Basically. He has like this chassis and everything for the car that he wants to get.

But he is like, I, I, I can’t do it for less than 85 grand or something like that. And then that’s when stuffy’s like, Well, I got that 51 Panhead, blah blah . I’ll do it, throw it in for the other five. And I’m like, is that a good deal? Or I, I, I asked Dan the same question. Okay, . I was like, what’s that worth? Is that a good deal?

So Dan, let me ask you this. What would you have paid for that thing or this hot car or for the pan Heaven. He’d have found it on Facebook Marketplace for 2,500 bucks and he’d had talked ’em down to $20 cuz it’s got a busted starter. Yep. And he’s like, I can fix that. Most of those were Kickstarter, but I’ll go with that.

I mean, you’re, you’re the cheapest racer. I know, dude. Tell me, what would you have paid for that? What would you have done in trade for that? Frugal. He’s a frugal racer. No, he’s fucking cheap. . He’s a frugal. He’s just fucking cheap. . I am a cheap skate. I will not deny it, but I do [01:04:00] well for being a cheap scap.

I think the five grand for one of those motors, like in today’s not like definitely well worth it. What about for that late model that’s super late model that he was picking up? 80 grand. Do you think that’s a bargain? No, I don’t think that’s a bargain. Yeah. Say uh, that that’s where I was like, yeah, maybe there’s somebody else selling literally anything.

You know . Yeah. But this is the only guy in that five mile radius. I take my money and go back and buy that Mustang and he doesn’t have a car anymore, so, right. Yeah. Just Uber out there. You gotta give the old man credit for being able to read off his summit and Jag’s racing parts list. That was pretty good.

I mean, I give more acting than we saw in the whole movie. I got this Ro Ambulator and this turbo charger and this blah blah blah that. That was his one line he had, he practiced that for a week. Yeah. He didn’t need a cue card or anything. That’s why they hired him. How many car parts can you list in a row in one minute?

Camou, , Camou, . No, no, no. That’s the name of our lead. Oh, sorry. Sorry. I got confused. got that. Got that. S d Ignition. Yeah. [01:05:00] Flux capacitor. Is Sam Deman Monroe a a car part? . But let’s talk about the next best, greatest part of the film. Oh, stumpy story. That. But then, so we had the radio show, the stumpy story and the music montage.

Oh, Jesus. Yes. Wait, wait. Here was a music. Did I like fall asleep? There were two of them. There were two music montages. The first one I was wondering if Shania was singing. Yeah. Oh, the national anthem. That’s not a montage. No, no, no, no. Oh yeah. No, no. It, it was the father and son. They’re like building, putting the car together and all that stuff.

And yeah, I thought it was Shania singing too, and I was waiting for it to like pan back and, uh, Becker, whatever character is two guys working, take , you know, whatever. Like in the scene I’d be like, holy shit. Just got a star. What song was playing while they were working on the car? Some generic, yeah, that don’t impress me much.

Country twang bullshit. It was all [01:06:00] pancakes and sausage and pain, you know, all that kind of thing. But the second song was the big music montage. You know, when they’re, they’re turning them ratchets and putting them wheels on and getting that car ready for the track with that montage. I like how like in the middle of Montage it has something pop up, say one week until the new season opener, which was the championship race.

The montage is still going on by the way. So we get like another two minutes and then it pops up. Race day. Oh, hold on. I wanna know how to . I wanna . I wanna know how Tanya missed three minutes of an 84 minute movie. It’s a blackout. Were you abducted by aliens? Like it’s a bake to do. It’s the third thing. A scene in the movie.

Well, I remember they were putting the car again. Her brain turned off to try and save her. I remember they were putting, she got up and walked out to get a drink refill. Probably I, I, I, I remember them putting the car together and then I remember it being suddenly the first race of the season championship race, the most important [01:07:00] race of the year,

I think when I heard it was the first race of the season, which was also a championship race. I like stop. Well see. No, it was the Race of Champions. It wasn’t a championship race. Is that the distinction I missed? Yes. It’s the race of champion now I’m like almost wanna like rewatch this to pick up all the things.

How was Cam a champion? Cam wasn’t a champion. They did definitely say it was the most important race of the year and I was like, get the fuck outta here . There’s like 30 more of these most important basketball game of the year. That’s the way NASCAR does it though. I mean the Daytona 500 I believe kicks off the NASCAR season.

Yeah. And it’s arguably the most important race of the year. Well, yeah. Well that’s marketing. Well, exactly. So there you go. They gotta market the dirt track season. Did you not pay now full that stadium malls dirt track. Try to market game number 48 of 162, like a baseball season. . Oh, it’s su. Super important.

It’s against our rivals. The other team from three states away. Then we’ve played five other times. . We’re also gonna play at their place four [01:08:00] times next week. , can we just go back to the baseball bat part? I mean,

no guys, cuz it’s race day, so that’s time to trade some paint roll credits. How many times did they say trading paint? They said it like a hundred times. Like four times at least. Yeah. I think you could do a drinking game just on how many times they say trading paint. Oh, that’s why she blacked out. Well, I mean, look at it this way.

What are the things, what are the things they can’t say in a stock car, dirt track NASCAR movie anymore. They can’t say good movie. Robins Racing. . Robins Racing Shaken Bake. There’s like a million of ’em of it. So what did they come up? Work trade and paint a paint Pi at the Home Depot. Paint Don’t hurt.

Here, I’ll give you this can give that can.

Other than Talent Knight, what other movies have they ever used? Shaken Bacon there? It doesn’t matter. It can’t be reused by another movie. That’s the whole thing, right? The Julie, the Julia Child movie had shaken bacon. Come [01:09:00] with me. If you want to live. You can’t use that. Hey Steve, I’ve got some Valspar if you’ll trade me some bear.

All right. . . I got that. Sherwin Williams. Anybody wants to trade up? Is that interior or exterior paint? That’s that semigloss exterior. Oh shit. I’m in. But if I got some rustoleum rattle cans, you ain’t gotta, hold on. How did I know? How did I know you were gonna say that? Like get that weak sauce outta here.

They came in the back of the Mercury Sable that he’s got . Wait, what color is it? It’s rust Sea foam. Green rust color.

Dan’s the opposite of Henry Ford. He’s like, it comes in whatever color you want, as long as it’s rust . I got Rustoleum rust colored rust paint. Yeah, I just wanted all the match . All right, so it’s race day. Um, Every day is Dre’s day. Bob ends up like spinning out cam and a yellow flag is pulled out and he needs to start his [01:10:00] engine before they lap him.

Otherwise, he’s disqualified. They said he was gonna be disqualified a pay car, and all the other cars went by him. I’ve never known that to happen. You’re just a lap down, which means you’re a lap down. I’ve never seen somebody get LAPD and become disqualified. Why was that tool bag that wrecked cam not disqualified or whatever in that race when he took the son?

Because they traded paint, because plot, because plot, I dunno. Plot holes, plot holes. And of course he starts adjusting time, but he’s one lap behind with two laps left in ten second laps, . And I’m like, then he’s fucking done. This is math. He’s, but no, apparently he says, fuck your 20 mile an hour speed limit.

I’m punching it up to Fitty. And he goes around. The same thing happened in Days of Thunder. Didn’t he like get spun outta or wherever? He’s like, get me out in front of the Pace car. Get me out in front of the Pace car. Exactly right. God, I need to watch Days of Thunder. I thought the same thing happened in Death Race 2000 when they sped up the [01:11:00] camera speed.

And that’s how we ended up where we are. Yeah. , oh, oh, I, I, I have that. He got up to second place by editing . Is that how you do it? Okay, so he spun out. He’s got one lap left, two laps left, whatever the hell it was. Why the hell weren’t you driving that fast for the other 50 lap? And you could have been laughing everybody else.

It’s the same reason in Ford versus Ferrari. He wasn’t in the top gear. He was cruising it like one 50 or whatever. He is like, I got a little bit more in it and he just keeps going. It was his first race back then in around that baseball bat. I mean the track a couple times, getting a little dizzy, losing his focus.

Doesn’t wanna get another wreck. So yeah, he gets up to second place by editing. It’s the final stretch. There’s one lap left now, and he gets the inside line. Cue the music. Oh, he won, I guess. Okay. That’s cool. That was cut. Weird. Um, , I got lost, like, right. Oh, we’re coming around the final stretch and it’s over.

That’s, it’s like a quarter mile track or Michael Bay jumps in and edited that section. Yeah, dot we’re done [01:12:00] and yada yada yada birthday party. more lack of enthusiasm for a victory as well. I, I will admit, I fell asleep during this most exciting championship race of champion races that aren’t, Champions of the first race of the year and Dan kind of nudges me.

He is like, Hey, check out this birthday party. I’m like, what? Why is this important? . Oh yeah. Okay. So yeah, so he wins the race. We hit the, the music cue of the, I’m just a pole boy doing the best I can. And like Sam and Shania kiss and there’s bottles being pop. The mc of this event is just so fucking slow.

slow. I feel like it was like the last scene in the movies. Like, we need 80 minutes. We’re only at 76. I got this all rightful. Congratulations Cambri [01:13:00] Monroe for your victory. Oh yeah. I just thank my dad and uh, I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you. And I’m like, yeah, he’s talking about a seed.

Yeah. Steve, this is when the Quaaludes began to take home . Yeah, pretty much. And then I’ve written down, wow, a dozen fans are there to share this moment, right? All 12. There was the one black guy in the back who looked really surprised to be there. I was just trying to go get some chicken. I stumbled into the wrong place.

I I, I have to ask, cause the dozen fans or whatever being in the stands, that’s about the most realistic thing in this movie, right? They’re all like, related to the drivers. They, it’s like a church basketball game where like, either they’re related to somebody playing in the game or they’re just waiting till their games up next.

I thought it was pretty realistic that nobody knew who Shania Twain was. . I mean, as far as like the real life racing. I mean, Dan goes to these actual races in real life. He doesn’t [01:14:00] compete in them, but he, he definitely watches them. And I mean, Dan, you’re always sending us video back. The stands are pretty.

Yeah. I mean, what did I say? There’s always that one guy who’s not related to anybody who’s jerking off on the ground. . Oh, . I think we found ’em. . Well, if you listen to Eddie and Dan’s stories, they always start with my cousin. Like he has like 500 cousins, right? I can never keep track. I’m sure when he’s at the dirt track.

Everybody’s a cousin . Good chance of it. Ok to all of them. There you go. Yes. That was a little bit skewed, but you know, you gotta look at their budget. I mean, look how much they were projected to yield. Maybe 10,000 is what the goal was. They couldn’t afford all the extras to fill this. Oh, no, no. They’re trying to get millions, not thousands of dollars.

Yeah babe. That was, nobody makes a movie for thousands of dollars. and, and, and yet this one is and gets John Travolta in it. Yeah. They wanted earn tens of dollars. . Yeah. Like was this a high school [01:15:00] or freshman college? Like movie Keystone project. I don’t, no, it’s more middle school level. It’s like one of Travolta’s grandkids or something and like, Hey, uh, uh, grandpa John, um, , can you you help me out world credits?

And like the wife or whatever is like hanging out of the window of the car, like waving a flag. Like yeah, yeah, we won. Suck a dick. Bitches. . . I think he’s paraphrasing. The big thing that I took issue with and I told Eric when we were watching, I was like, wait till the end because like, I don’t know why I got under my skin so bad at the scene where Cam and Cindy are outside of the trailer talking.

They wake the baby at the very end at the credits. It’s the baby’s first birthday. And I’m like, the math is not adding up here. You can wake a baby who’s almost a year old, they still sleep. No, what, what he’s leaving out of this is that if you paid really close attention to the racing sequences, as riveting as they were Yeah.

It’s more than a year. Yeah. Cause it goes through several seasons. Yeah, yeah, [01:16:00] yeah. Exactly. Every race was a championship race too. Most important race of the year. I’m like from a perspective, I guess. Well, they were doing S C A and then they were doing B M W club and then they were doing Porsche club. So they were doing EM two.

They had to win all the series, all the championships, double elimination tournament. You saw all those trophies. So this was like actually my fault, like at the party at the end, , it’s not super clear, it’s a baby’s birthday, especially when they blow candles and the baby’s not there. So I’m like, is this some dumb shit where they bought babies for his birthday stuff to celebrate his first major win because that’s some dumb shit I would do.

like just cross out. Congratulations on your first, and then the only thing they have is birthday. That makes so much more sense, doesn’t it? I think we know what we’re doing for Summer Bash next year. ? Yes. So wait a minute. It wasn’t a birthday party after all. Like my, my mind is blown now. Like, I gotta, this is my series.

I mean, we’re skipping to the end, but Who blows out the [01:17:00] candles? What do you mean skipping to the end? We’ve already talked about the plot. We finished the movie. This is the End . I mean others slightly more, but yeah, the, it’s, it’s the wife that actually blows out the candles, not the kids. So it’s like wow, wow, wow.

So the, the race that he won that time was, it wasn’t a champ, it was the one race that wasn’t a championship. That was the Race of Champions. Okay. So maybe it’s his first win at a Race of Champions. So maybe that comes in with that. So, I mean, they’re celebrating something. Hey, there’s always a reason for celebrating being alive, man.

That’s for sure. Celebrating the end of the movie. That’s a good celebration. That’s what it’s, amen. Amen. The credits came on and the party started. Literally No, but did you, did you watch through the credits cuz there was extended scenes? No. What you lie. I’m not lying. There was some more, this is nuts in the Marvel universe.

What the hell are you talking about? ? Yeah. Nick Fury showed up and wanted to know if, uh, John Travolta wanted to come back as, uh, we need you. The, the Punisher nemesis. I don’t, by the way, there is a Punisher logo on the wall during that birthday party thing at the end too. It was like, oh, you slide dog.

[01:18:00] Yeah. Friend of the podcast, Thomas Jane. Woo. I wanna say the baby showed up in the credits because I feel like there was a baby. But y’all are saying there was no baby. Did he just walk into the scene? Yeah. No. No. So the baby’s there when they walk in the door and they’re all like, yeah, yeah. Bouncing the baby.

They’re not shaking the baby. They bet they’re bouncing the baby. Shaking the hell. Yeah. They shake the baby. But then that’s a the candle, the candle cer blowing out. Scene and cake serving. Scene. No baby. Yeah, just adults. They put baby down for an app and then they, oh, baby was holding the camera. Baby was holding the camera.

make yourself useful here. Camera Raider Jr. , Sam Cam. The baby pops out like Mortal Combat. It’s like dusty, dusty, , . It’s birthday. Oh, that was the other thing too, the like, it’s a girl stuffing up there. I’m like, oh, is it like a gender reveal party? Like, oh no, it’s a first birthday party. Did we not know it was a girl bef for the last year?

Look, I’m telling you, you babe, this is because they won the big trophy and they just [01:19:00] pulled out all the decoration theory from the last, yeah, from the last party or whatever and yeah, yeah, yeah. Cause again, this is some dumb shit I would do . Why? Why is the end of this movie so complex? Now? You guys are telling me there was a gender repeal I didn’t pick up on.

No. No. Okay. That probably when N was like, no, no. They’re just celebrating his first win. It’s just, that’s the decorations they had and it. Okay. Yeah, that makes sense. I would’ve assumed that the movie like this, all the stereotypes included, that it would’ve been the third generation dark track racer. It’s gonna be another son.

But now you’re telling me it’s a girl. Nobody wants one of them. No. Hasn’t. Wow. I only wanna be worried about one penis. Not all of them. I am. My mind is blown. Now, Dr. Bald did say earlier his mama would’ve raised if his daddy would’ve let her, so maybe the granddaughter will raise. You’re reading this much into the, why is there so much packed into the ending?

Y’all didn’t even wash the credits. All right. Well, what, what happens? What happens then? They’re setting up for trading paint too. Don’t remember. [01:20:00] I, I, I wasn’t brave enough to stick around to see if, you know, they get tied into the Fast and Furious franchise , like Vin Diesel shows up in a parking garage, like, We did good driving out there.

Family. I got, yeah, I thought about saving the world and change your name to Brian. We’re family. You guys are Gary. Gary Cole shows up and he is like, I’m gonna need you to work on Saturday . That’d be great. . I mean, the affect of everybody in this film is on par with office space. That is for sure. But wow, I didn’t know.

I’m now, now you’re gonna make me go back and re-watch this. I need to re-watch the ending apparently, because I have missed so much . Uh, so yeah. So guys, that’s, uh, trading paint. Would you recommend watching it at least three times to get its intricacies? I think you get them all by listening to this podcast.

Yeah. How many ways can I say no? Nine . Which would you rather watch again? Trading Paint or the Charlie Sheen Porsche movie. Charlie Sheen. Porsche movie. I would rather watch paint dry than trading [01:21:00] paint. is the prequel clock primer . There is, it’s pronounced primer and it’s a time travel movie that’s really confusing, but very interesting.

Sounds super confusing. Infinitely more interesting than this movie. So to take an offer him, Steve and Izzy. So the Charlie Sheen Porsche movie with DB Sweeney from the 1980s is known as No Man’s Land. We talked about that on the trivia episode. It was written by Dick Wolf from Law and Order.

Everybody does that when I say that. Well, that’s when is it? What isn’t it When, uh, Dick Wolf’s name comes up? It’s the

Like, that will sound cute. I think Brad, I would watch the No Man’s Land on repeat over watching this again. Oh, just watch. Cutting edge. Yeah. Topic . So Steven Izzy, is this the worst movie you’ve ever watched? No. Fuck no. Oh, no, no, [01:22:00] no, no. Come on. No, no. This is, have you ever heard our podcast? This is not like the worst movie we’ve seen this month.

This is the worst racing movie we’ve seen. Yeah, we watch Trash . But, uh, if, if you wanna a good version of this movie, I mean, I like the movie Driven, even though I know it’s pure trash. It’s directed by Renny Harlan. It’s got Sylvester Stallone Till Feiger. If you want the good version of this movie, you’ve watched Days of Thunderer, thousand percent.

Oh yeah. I mean, you mean Top Gun, top Gun in a Car. You know what? Top Gun doesn’t have that Days of Thunder. Robert Duval. That’s right. Tanya’s number one, Hollywood heartthrob. Robert Duval. I dunno if he’s number one. Yeah. Instead we got Val Kilmer. Tom Scar, uh, Goose momentarily. This movie was much better than any melatonin I’ve ever taken.

so much better. We’re getting a good night’s rest. I gotta tell you, if it wasn’t for the noise of the race scenes, [01:23:00] it’s like the same level. Level, the whole way through it. Cause it’s so monotone and the acting was just horrible. I think it could have been way better if they had better actors or better acting had been done.

Better writing didn’t exist. If it was a better movie, it would’ve been a better movie. This was a better movie. It would’ve been so much better on if there was at least one pair of boobs, should have had at least one pair of boobs. And we brought it down. It doesn’t 2000, there was no Hand grenade, which is Steve’s favorite part of that movie.

He forgets about it. Every time we watch it, it comes up and he giggles like a schoolgirl when it’s amazing. He giggles and goes, God damnit. That was in the movie. Which movie? A Death Race, 2000. David Harry. It’s a ham grenade . So another Stallone racing movie. . Yeah. Another Stallone racing movie. Speaking of movies that are way worse than this one, nobody ever watched Billy Jack.

What ? Who? God. Yeah. Billy Jack is the best Billy Jack movie and they made four of ’em. I know. And they’re all terrible. So we’re gonna have to put a [01:24:00] disclaimer on this episode and apologize to our audience for bringing this gem to their attention. How are we gonna reconcile with our touring fans and what, what are we gonna review the next time you guys think, Ooh, ooh, let’s see.

Racing movies. We got talk about, I mean, we could talk Ford v. Ferrari, cause uh, my mom’s boyfriend. Shelby’s nephew. Ooh, guess what? They’re all, all the Shelbys are assholes. Wait, spoiler.

I’m sure that shocks no one in the car community. Right? . We’ll have our adoring fans will have to wait and find out. We don’t wanna give ’em any spoilers as to what we’re gonna review next. Oh, Tanya’s got something. Do you see the Jackie Chan movie? Well, the Jackie Chan racing one, apparently he’s like in a driver’s suit and holding the helmet.

What? Oh, uh, wait, the Can Cannonball Run, wasn’t he in there? It’s called Thunderbolt May, 1995. Oh yeah. Thunderbolt. Oh yeah. See that mechanic? Jackie Chan has to be the [01:25:00] super criminal street racer and he’s like all suited up in the car. Yeah, I’m down for Thunderbolt or any of those shitty Herbie movies we can call.

I think that we have found our next movie, Thunderbolt. And if we’re gonna do Herbie, we definitely gotta do the one with the Chin, the Lost Herbie movie. You know I’m talking about right. The Bruce Campbell. Yeah. Yeah, the TV movie. I think that’s the same one that it has a friend of the podcast. Dana Gould in it?

Or was he in the Lindsay Lohan one? Never Go. I think he was Alon. I don’t, I don’t remember. He has a small part guys, are you sure you don’t wanna do Racing Stripes? Yep. What are we talking about? What? What kind of movie is that? Because it’s racing horses babe? No, it’s Racing A Zebra and Frankie Munez does the voice

That is definitely not what I was thinking. Car Racing, babe. Thunderball, Jackie Chan. Don’t mess this up, . Okay. Otherwise we’ll get another trading game. Something top Something. Apparently there’s another Travolta racing movie. What’s, there’s another Travolta racing movie. There’s [01:26:00] a it’s, it’s speedboats.

Yeah. Yeah. Speed Kills. Oh yes. It’s horrible. We’ve seen that. That’s a terrible movie. Don’t do it. It’s better than this movie though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There’s least action in it. Look, whenever you add water to racing, it’s better. . Sorry, car Racers. That’s right. You should only have races in the rain. Wait, that’s a movie about a dog.

Anyway, right? The book was better spoiler. Well, listeners, I think we have given you a proper taste of maybe what a normal, everything I learned from movies episode is like Stephen Izzy have really ramped it up this episode. Whew. Obviously we’re reviewing one of their all-time favorite films here, so if you’re interested in learning more about their show, how do they go about finding out more?

We can’t be found. Shut up. No . Don’t tell them that. They won’t look. No. You can find us on all the major podcasters under everything I learned from movies. Or you can hit us up directly on Twitter, Facebook and Paton on it. E i L f movies. That’s [01:27:00] everything I learned from movies. Uh, babe, are you on social media at all?

I am. You can find me everywhere at Untidy Venus. That’s a goddess who’s batted housekeeping. I’m on all the social medias at Untidy Venus. See what kinds of crazy stuff I’m up to. I also sell my goods and wears@untidyvenus.etsy.com, and you can join my Patreon for as little as $4 a month. You can get a sticker of my design, waterproof UV resisted mailed with a handwritten note to your home.

There’s lots of levels. Come and join. Steve? Yes. Where can we find you? As mentioned at E I F movies this month we’re wrapping up Nick August Cage, which is the most wonderful time of the year when we talk about Nicholas Cage movies, and then we’re going into Super Sexy Sing in September. Woo. That’s right, baby.

You like musicals from the eighties. All right, but we’re gonna talk about ’em anyway. It’s gonna be great. . Taste the Apples. Taste the apples grease. Two Voy of the Rock Aliens. A whole bunch of shit coming out. It’s gonna be great. Hey, where can we find you [01:28:00] guys? We are always available online@gtmotorsports.org org G.

That’s GT as in Graham Touring Motorsports with an s.org. We’re on social at Gran Touring Motorsports most everywhere except for Twitter, where we’re GT Motorsports 14. We are also on Patreon, patreon.com/gt Motorsports, and you can search for the show either by Gran Touring or Break Fix on all your favorite pod catchers or music apps, whichever you prefer.

Oh, and on that note, well guys, thank you. Thank you as always. Well, thanks for having us. That was a riot because I think we pulled more value out of that movie than the movie Pulled Value.

I blame Mount Man, Dan for watching it three times and getting all those questions we had. He’s giving it all the views on it. , he is the 31% on Rotten Tomatoes,

But don’t impress me.[01:29:00]

If you like what you’ve heard and want to learn more about gtm, be sure to check us out on www.gt motorsports.org. You can also find us on Instagram at Grand Tour Motorsports. Also, if you want to get involved or have suggestions for future shows, you can call or text us at (202) 630-1770 or send us an email at crew chief gt motorsports.org.

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